Exiles

"Our life-long nostalgia, our longing to be reunited with something in the universe from which we feel cut off, to be on the inside of some door which we have always seen from the outside, is no mere neurotic fancy, but the truest index of our real situation."- C.S. Lewis, "The Weight of Glory"

I've been reading Tim Keller's The Prodigal God over the last week.  Great book.  Keller briefly explores the famous parable of the prodigal son and argues that the older son---the one who was disappointed in his father for taking his younger brother back---was every bit as lost as the younger son.  Both, he says, were ultimately outside the home---one chose to leave and live wildly and the other was so religious that he found himself resisting the father's love.  As Keller spells out this argument, an interesting discussion of exile unfolds.  The Bible is a story of exiles looking for a place to call home.  In Genesis, Adam and Eve are expelled from the Garden.  Cain is forced to wander after killing Abel.  Jacob has to flee his home.  Joseph is sent away from his home and family.  The story continues throughout the Old Testament with numerous periods of Israelite exile and oppression.  This story of exile climaxes in the Gospels when the death and resurrection of Christ ultimately opens the door to God's house, a home that all men over all times have been desperately trying to enter---whether they knew it or not.  God's home is the only true and lasting home.

I'm finding this to be true in my own life.  The Lewis quote above hits the nail on the head.  As I get older and enter new phases of my life, I realize that you really can't ever go home again.  Sure, we can continue to remain in the love of our families and friends, visit our childhood home, return to key places and people from our past.  But it really is never the same.  My parents' house will never be the same for me as it was when I was a child.  Roles have changed, life is different.  My closest friends from a couple of years ago, people I talked to every day in Tennessee, are people I chat with once in a great while.  Guys I lived with in college, I have no idea what they are doing or where they are.  Even if I did, that home that was created for two years can never be the same again.  Try visiting your old church a few years after moving on.  Some things will be familiar, but ultimately, you can't recreate what was once there.  I know I'm rambling here, but I hope you are seeing where I'm coming from.  Everything changes so fast, it feels like we are always unsuccessfully trying to grasp "home" before it slips away and things change.  As Alyssa and I work on shaping our life together and our home, it won't be long before things change again.  The kids will grow up and move on.  We may move.  God could call us to new jobs or churches.  Friendships will evolve.  Home is transient and is constantly changing.

Ultimately, this deep desire for a secure and unchanging home is found in our relationship with Jesus Christ.  That emptiness we feel when things change can only be remedied when we truly rest in Him.  He is our Rock, the same yesterday, today and forever.  I must remember this as I reflect on change.  As we get ready to adopt sweet Kaylee and give her a "home," I cannot forget that the most important home we can give her is a relationship with God.  It is the most secure place that she, or any of us, can ever find ourselves.